- When we face a misery, most of the times we have or we find something/someone to blame – a person, a decision or the system, which/who is directly or indirectly responsible for our downfall. But how about a person born with a physical disability. Who should he blame? I think he is more entitled to blame somebody/something and simply do nothing. Instead if he choose to try and to smile with whatever he got from God, that my friend is the real COURAGE. I read about one such guy who has no hands and still finished at podium in numerous cycle races. Salute!
- We often say there is a limit to everything. For how many times I can try and still fail. Well there is none, go be an ant. I might be cruel on my part but I experimented with with one where I kept on putting one or another obstacle on its way to food. She kept on trying and I kept on stopping and many a times, at its very last moment. After a while I had to go for some urgent work and when I returned, the ant was devouring the hard earned food. So just keep on trying and eventually your problems/bad luck too will go away for some urgent work.
You always feel good if someone sympathizes with you for your loss or misfortune. Although sympathy/empathy is necessary for a person to regroup and recover, it will do more harm than good if you let it run longer. In bad times, our whole body acts like black hole which can digest all kind words and help thrown towards it and still not get satiated.
You need to remember that times change for everyone and everyone goes through bad phase at one or another point in their life. If many of the great people of the past and present hadn’t shown courage to come out their misfortunes, you wouldn’t have many luxuries and utilities of today.
You have had your share of sympathies, now it’s time to show COURAGE. You have done it before and you can do it AGAIN. Resolute and be firm in your decision as the tide is about to turn. Start with the way you think and the rest will follow.
Q. “Who is the God?”
A. “Time is the God”
Q. “What is the prayer”
A. “Honest, just and effective use of Time is your only prayer”
If you believe this, you will never be unhappy again.
If you pray this you, you will never be in need of anything again.
PS: Structure comes from a dialogue from the movie – The Great Debaters.
Water goes up in the air in the form of gas and comes down again as solid or liquid. Then it travels from mountain to oceans through meandering rivers withstanding hits from gravels, sand, silt, clay, hard rocks, soft rocks and what not. When it adepts to the turbulent ways of ocean, the intense heat from Sun forces it to change not only its shape but also its inner traits. These forceful changes go on eternally for water but it NEVER complains. Rather at every change it comes out as winner, be it transforming into its purest form leaving behind salt of the ocean or being used for irrigation for the sustenance of humanity.
If a lifeless thing such as water cannot avoid change, how can you? If it can take every change as a chance to excel, why can’t you? If it can work for a cause in all its form, so you can. As they say change is the only constant. Don’t complain, just try and we will have a winner right there.
They bumped into each other after fourteen years. Roy was driving a Mercedes while his friend, Tom, was riding in a cab. Their eyes met when their cars were waiting at a traffic signal. Soon they were sitting in a café discussing life thus far. While Roy gloried in his success and achievements, Tom listened to his stories with rapt attention. Finally Roy asked Tom what his life had been. Tom said his life hadn’t been that complex to explain. By God’s grace, he had managed to feed his family and then save some by doing what he loved doing.
“But why?” interrupted Roy.
“You were exceptional during college days and we all thought you will be the most successful among us”
“Don’t you have desires anymore to live in a big house, drive a fancy car and travel around the world?”
Tom smiled and asked Roy calmly, “why do we desire all that in the first place? To be happy, right? ”
“And look at me, don’t I look happy”
“I don’t get bored for a moment while working as I do what I love the most. The work gives me enough money to take care of my family’s needs and they do not complain. You may be eating big meals in big restaurant every other day but ultimately when it goes in your stomach it all breaks down to sugar and serve the same purpose – provide nutrient & energy. Our stomachs don’t care only our tongues tell the difference between foods. But then I have trained my taste buds and the brain to feel as delighted at eating at home as yours at a restaurant. It is just a choice that I made and I am happy with that”, Tom added.
“If I go your route it will never end – the CHASE. Today, you need million bucks a year, may be, to live a decent life as per your standards. And you still desire to earn many more millions in coming years. When you fulfill one of your desires the other will set in and thus the chase continues. There is nothing wrong in being ambitious and that ambition can be any. But what matters is if you are happy and content with that choice. Are you?, he asked Roy.
Roy thought for a moment and then said, “Honestly I do feel great at times when I get importance among my friends and society. But my family always complains that I don’t give enough time to them. When I am alone, I am not confident in the route I have chosen. I am always anxious that something or other will go wrong. At times I wonder what the best way to live life is?”
“True, we all are initially”, added Tom, ” but then you are the only one who can find YOUR true way to live a happy life. And you will if you try. You will not believe in my true way if I tell you so. You don’t need any outside help; rather all you need is a sincere attempt. You have all the knowledge, wisdom and experience to determine your true way. Go find ONE for yourself ”
I had gone to woods with my friends on an adventurous overnight trip. The woods were lovely, dark and deep. After putting up tents deep inside the forest, we swam in a nearby stream. Crystal clear water in the river was flowing with gusto. Time passed by and it was only after 2 hours that we realised Amol was missing. Panicked we searched for him all around but couldn’t trace him. It had started to get dark and we were about 30 miles away from the nearest dwelling. We tried all emergency numbers but got no help. Then two of us went on a bike to nearby village. I and a friend stayed put hoping Amol would return any moment. Roarrrrrrr! suddenly I felt as if I am in a the darkest cave of the universe. A wild animal had come from nowhere and grabbed me by my head. I was trembling and shouting in pain and agony. It was then when I was about to passout, a noise came from a distance – Get up boy!
“Get up and get up fast if you don’t want to miss the magical morning”, my father was shaking me to get up. Relieved to find self in my bed, I noticed the first ray of sunlight peeking over the top of the courtyard wall. Shaken, I said to my father, remember dad, you told me once that no matter how dark the night is, the very first ray of sunlight makes it disappear quickly and magically.
Every nightmare eventually gets over, yours will too. Remember – there will always be a light immediately after the dark of the night. You just need to hang on.
- I went to bank other day and show a physically disabled yet vibrant lady laboring to sit on the chair all by herself. She had to do it many times in a single day and yet she greets you with the perfect smile. If she can do it why can’t you? Are your pains greater than hers?
- “What is the point of resting this body when one day it shall too pass” said a 75 years old lady living nearby my house. Even at this age, she will help you day and night without complaining or getting tired. Everyone’s work is her work. Amazing!
- I met my father’s friend who recently lost his beloved teenage son and yet he was so lively and cheerful. I think that is the way to live this life. No matter what keep going….
Morning air feels refreshing with scent of rose and marigold. Radiant sun is slowly coming up the horizon engulfing darkness. Creatures of night are scared for their life as the habitat is all set for new life. While Glorious sun will fire up even the darkest corners, soothing wind will douse the deepest fears. Ideal time for you to rise and shine as today is your day
“Happiness is directly proportional to acceptance and inversely proportional to expectation”-Michael J Fox
What if scenarios feed anxiety the most and take away much of our creativity and courage. All the time we fear something will go wrong – the what-ifs. Irony is we all know this fact but still cannot do away with it. Why? Because it is not easy to control how we think and our body generates stress hormones in response to our thoughts. So we need to continuously feed our brain to make it think positively. The most effective way to do is by first acknowledging and then accepting the worst outcome of a problem in our life. If you find acceptance of the worst too much, mere acknowledgement will relieve most of the stress.
Why do we worry so much about outcomes? Ultimate truth is we all go empty handed and there will always be something that remains unfulfilled at your deathbed. We all die unhappy and unsatisfied. Moreover we live a life of series of if scenarios – all of them the 1st, 2nd and 3rd conditionals (regrets and wishes).
- If I had only taken that route, I would have owned a fortune by now
- If I get a million, I will live a satisfied life
- If won a lottery, I would a Lamborghini and a villa.
The body automatically resets to normal once you accept the worst. It is much milder than what you go through during an emotional trauma such as a loss of loved one or a break up. Moreover, at the moment, you already have what majority of people on this planet only dream. Set free your body and mind from the prison of your expectations and you will start enjoying the finer joys of life. Live free and die happy.
Very often I think which act is wrong and which one is right. Almost all of us have a tendency to criticize others for nothing. In fact when people gossip about somebody, discussion will mostly be around bad side of that person. They make comments such as he stole a lady’s purse other day; he doesn’t fit in this society; he is greedy; she is a call girl; and he steals to feed is family . The basic question which bothers me is who decides what is wrong and what is right? You, me or a bunch of people called as society? Practically it is decided by the majority in society. Over a period of time they had compiled a list of morals & ethics which says what is wrong and what is right. But are they right and should we follow each one of them?
Every rule is meant to be broken. Every rules needs to be modified. Right? If we don’t do things which are not in that list then life will become monotonous and nothing new will happen in the world. You can imagine this from the very fact that many great inventors were ignored by this very great society when they invented things. Some Classic examples are:
- Galileo was branded as a heretic and sent to prison for declaring that the earth traveled around the sun
- Milton (1996) explained how the invention of what is now considered a very ordinary object, the light bulb, was initially mired in controversy and disbelief.
You did not ask society before taking birth on this land. If you believe in God then you were sent here by Him to follow your own rules. In this very society, people take contradictory stands for an event. Society in itself is confused and you will be wasting your time to figure out the good side of society. So do whatever you feel is right. In the end all wrongs are right and all rights are wrong. For example –
- Many people feel that Saddam Hussein did nothing wrong and rather he was simply running his country efficiently. But then US and others think otherwise for their own reasons
- There are people who feel that Mahatma Gandhi didn’t do as good as he did bad to the country. He let down country for propagating his own ambitions.But there are others who worship him for what he did. He is called father of the nation in India for nothing.
- Lord Krishna had thousand wives. He did many things which are very wrong as the list of wrongs and rights compiled by the society and still we worship Him as almighty.
You get only one life and it is short. If you live it by standards set by others then you will be simply wasting it. Moreover you do not take anything with you – not even your so called good or bad deeds. What matters is how feel as you age and how you feel when you die. So live free and die happy. As I said all wrongs are right and all rights wrongs, you just need to change the perception.